Saturday, January 14, 2012

Outta Balance. Outta Control.

The year:  2007.

Little did I know
this would be the beginning of my metamorphosis.
Slowly, a new life began to unfold,
like the wings of a butterfly.

Life took on a whole new importance,
a new meaning.
The sky was bluer. 
Oceans more brilliant blue, gray and green.
Wine tasted sweeter, coffee richer.
Rain, beach and the forest smelled fresher.

Hangin' with my kids. 
The sound of Sam's trumpet
giving me goosebumps or
hearing that 'crack' of ball meeting bat,
hitting the sweet spot. 
Giggling sleepovers in Seattle with Kandace. 
Just enjoying their smiles and our conversations.
Oh wait, there's more.
Painting.  Yoga.  Running.  Dancing. 
Traveling.  Hiking.  Knitting.

How was I going to 'enjoy' this new found joy?
How was I going to include so much more, um, life?
How was I going to mix calm and excitement?

In the beginning, it really was quite overwhelming.

Whew, I was at least headed in the right direction.
Defining what brings one joy is the first step. 
But, how was I going to make time for
that which brought me pure joy?

Ahhh, what or who was taking advantage
of my energy and not adding value to my life?

But wait, this would be walking a fine line
between being Selfless and SELFISH.
Is that allowed?

Then I thought of those air masks
falling from the ceiling of an airplane.
The flight attendant advising:
"please secure your mask,
before helping those around you".

Yes, it was time I started taking care of me. 
My body was clearly giving me signs.
My life was out of balance.

BC (before cancer),
I was on the brink of job burnout. 
Every volunteer position had
my name written all over it.

Time to change careers.
Learn to say no, politely. 
And time to prune toxic relationships. 

The result? 
AC (after cancer)
there's a whole lotta happy life going on!

I still get 'off-track' or unbalanced.
But instead of letting
years of energy be zapped,
almost immediately I 'right' myself.

So, what brings you joy?
How can you add just a
sprinkle of it to your life today?

Or, how 'bout
we spend the rest of our life, getting it right?


  1. WOW!!! This left me speechless, with my eyes filled with tears and my heart aching knowing that even though the words are you, I have a personal connection and meaning to them in my own life. One that I recognize but often ignore.

    Time to right my self and do it more often... with meaning and respect.

    Thank you Dawn for sprinkling a little joy on my life today with your words... and for sprinkling my life with your words, watching and listening to your sweet words...

    1. J.

      Thank you for your kind, kind words. It brings ME joy that I am in any way able to help someone else, especially someone who I can call, 'friend'. 'This' is not a dress rehearsal ... at the end, there won't be a 'do over' ...
      Thank you.